Passing on caring wisdom - Strengths Academy

Imagine you are running an educational session. How can you help people to grow? One approach is to learn from great educators. Such people often start by establishing clarity – the real results the students want to achieve – and making clear working contracts. They then go through three dimensions.

* They introduce the concept.

* They bring it to life by giving concrete examples.

* They move into the third dimension and go deeper by passing on caring wisdom.

This final step may involve sharing knowledge from the eternal principles that help people succeed.

Imagine that you are going to lead an educational session for a specific group of people. Let’s explore how you might run such a session.

* Start by establishing clarity – the concrete results to achieve – and making clear contracts.

Try tackling the exercise on this theme. First, describe the specific group of people for whom you are running the session. You may, for example, be working with a team of counsellors, a creative team, a company’s leadership team or another group. Second, describe the aims of the session. (You will, of course, check these with people to ensure you are all heading towards the same goals.) Third, describe what you see as your role and their roles in making it a successful session. Try completing the following exercise.

Looking at the exercise above, let’s imagine you aim to run an introductory session on The Art of Counselling. You may introduce it by saying something like:

“Welcome. The aims of today’s session are to focus on: a) The definition of counselling; b) The skills of counselling; c) The specific ways that you can use counselling skills. My role is to provide an overview, describe the key principles and give practical examples. The role I would like you to play is to encourage each other, take the ideas you like and add these to your repertoire. Are there any other themes you would like to explore? Okay, let’s begin.”

Whatever topic you are teaching, it is important to establish clarity and make clear working contracts. Check everybody understands, then move on to the next stage.

1) You can focus on the first dimension – the concept.

Great educators begin the actual work by introducing the first concept. So you may want to give the context, provide a model, ask people to revisit their own experiences or whatever. Different educators have different ways of giving the big picture.

If you are teaching about counselling, one approach is to start by asking people if they have any experience in this area. They may have provided counselling for students, employees or other people. Alternatively, they may have received counselling after an accident or other setback. Building on what they have said, you can then give an overview of the recent history of counselling. This may include, for example, the pioneering work of Carl Rogers, the growth of the self-help movement and the blurred borders between counselling and psychotherapy. You may then return to following the definition you plan to use during the session.

Counselling takes place when:

The person seeks help in a situation that may be causing difficulty. They are able to talk a caring environment, make sense of their experience and gather the strength to move forward. If appropriate, they explore their options and take more control of shaping their future.

The counsellor provides a caring environment in which the person feels safe and valued. They explain what they can and can’t offer – then make clear working contracts. The counsellor encourages the person to explore and, if possible, make sense of their experience. If appropriate, they enable the person to consider their options and take charge of shaping their future.

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‘Classical Counselling’ is non-directive. It provides a sanctuary in which people can feel at home and talk without fear of judgement. The process of ‘healing’ or ‘growth’ comes through the act of exploring and making sense of their experience. There are, of course, different views on the effectiveness of such an approach. Carl Rogers, who is considered the founder of modern counselling, believed that:

* The person who comes for counselling simply has ‘problems of living’. They also have ‘a drive towards self-actualisation’. This drive presses towards fulfilment and, if able to be expressed properly, increases the person’s chances of becoming healthy. If the drive is frustrated, the person may experience difficulties, some of which may be displayed in various symptoms.

* The helper’s role is to create an encouraging environment that facilitates the person’s growth. They can achieve this by being genuine, showing empathy and having unconditional positive regard. These are called the ‘core conditions’ for providing a good environment.

* The person feels valued and encouraged in the counselling situation. They are then more likely to be their real self, set goals and work towards fulfilling their potential. They can pursue their drive towards self-actualisation.

Carl Rogers believed the key was to provide the right environment. People could then develop their inner strength and pursue their chosen path. Counselling was one vehicle for enabling people to become what they wanted to become.

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Let’s return to the educational session you are running. Try tackling the exercise about introducing the concept. You may be teaching about counselling, creativity, leadership or whatever. First, describe the concept you want to introduce. Second, describe the specific things you can do to introduce this idea. Try completing the follow exercise.

2) You can focus on the second dimension – the concrete examples.

Great educators bring the concepts to life by giving concrete examples. How to make this happen? One approach is to get into the habit of introducing an idea and then saying: “For example _____.” This forces you to give illustrations that resonate with the particular audience.

Imagine that you are running a session on counselling. You may want to give specific examples by saying something like the following.

“Counselling skills can be used in many situations. For example, to help people: a) To explore their feelings; b) To make sense of a tough situation; d) To emotionally recover from abuse, an accident or other setback; c) To work through post-traumatic stress syndrome; e) To make transitions in their life and work. The aim is to enable people to feel more in control of shaping their future. Let’s try an exercise on this theme.”

“First, looking ahead, think of a specific situation in which you may need to practice counselling skills. For example, you may be helping somebody who has lost a job, suffered bereavement or faces a challenge. So choose a specific situation where you might use such skills in the future.”

“Second, make a flip chart describing the ‘Dos’ and ‘Don’ts’ for facilitating such a session. Remember, classical counselling helps somebody to explore the emotional side of the situation. If the person feels it may be useful, they can also consider the practical ways forward. The key, however, is that the person must feel in charge.”

“Be as specific as possible when describing the ‘Dos’ and ‘Don’ts’. For example, if you say: ‘Make the person feel welcome,’ describe the specific behaviour you can demonstrate to achieve this goal. Imagine that you are giving detailed directions for a film scene. Write in plain English, rather than ‘therapeutic language’. Describe the specific things that you will actually ‘Do’. Spend 20 minutes writing your flip chart. Then we will share the ideas.”

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Let’s return to the educational session that you may be running. There are many ways to bring an idea to life. Try tackling the exercise on this theme. Describe the specific things you can do to move from the concept to concrete examples that resonate with people in the group. Try completing the follow exercise.

3) You can focus on the third dimension – the caring wisdom.

Some educators go into a third dimension. They go deeper and pass on caring wisdom. This often involves revisiting some of the eternal principles. The ‘wisdom’ that is shared obviously differs from subject to subject, but the process remains similar. The educator wants to pass on timeless knowledge that enables students to succeed. So they may say something like:

“Today we have been looking at ______. But sometimes it can be useful to revisit some of the principles that people have followed over time. These principles include, for example:

* ____________________________________________________

“The ways that people have followed these principles have included, for example:

* ____________________________________________________

“Each of us must obviously find our own ways of doing things. But sometimes it can be useful to revisit and learn from these eternal principles.”

How does this approach work in practice? The themes you highlight will differ from topic to topic, but imagine that you are running a session on counselling. The timeless principles you cover may include the following three (though there are many more). Counselling highlights the importance of being able:

a) To take time in a sanctuary where you can reflect.

This is path taken by people throughout history. Seekers have used their sanctuary time to focus on the eternal truths, make sense of experience and clarify the way ahead. It is vital to feel safe in the sanctuary, but it is also good to get stimulation. People may achieve this by being close to nature, studying the great philosophies, being creative, focusing on their values or whatever. If appropriate, bring this theme to life by describing people in history that have spent time in a stimulating sanctuary.

b) To develop your inner strength.

People often develop strength by focusing on their chosen faith, vocation or life goals. Some gain it by tapping into their own or other people’s experience. Good counsellors, for example, help people to identify their inner strength by revisiting their positive history. So they may ask the person:

“Looking back on your life, have you even been in a similar situation and come through it successfully? What did you do right then? What were the principles you followed? How can you follow these principles in the present situation?”

Again, if appropriate, bring this theme to life by describing people in history who have developed their inner strength and tackled challenges successfully.

c) To be able to shape your future.

Counselling enables people to do some ‘slow thinking’. They have the opportunity to see things in perspective, clarify what is important and choose their way forward. Viktor Frankl, for example, describes how prisoners ‘chose their attitude’, even in the midst of the Nazi Concentration Camps. People need to feel in control: this is one of the eternal principles. Counselling can help people to take this step in their own way. If appropriate, describe people in history who have taken time out to clarify their options and shape their future.

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There are many ways to pass on caring wisdom. Whatever theme you are teaching, it is good to highlight the key principles that seem to work – and the paths that people seem to follow – throughout history. The students can then choose to follow these in their own ways.

Let’s return to the educational session you may be running. Bearing in mind the topic you will be teaching, try tackling the exercise on this theme. Describe the caring wisdom you want to pass on to people. If possible, think of people in history who have followed these principles successfully. Try completing the following exercise.

There are many ways to help people to succeed. One approach is to clarify the results to achieve. You can then aim to introduce the concept, give concrete examples and, if appropriate, pass on caring wisdom.